People watching

I've always been interested in human interraction. I studied it in college. Sociology was my minor (obvious correlation), and Communication was my major-- which had much to do with human interraction.

As much as I observe and analyze it, I never cease to be amazed by defensiveness. One thing I've observed is that it has so little to do with what is actually said. In my experience, it is tone and body language, rather than actual content, that cultivates a defensive environment.

Another thing I've noticed, is everyone-- to a various degrees-- is defensive. Yea, you're all thinking "duh...". I guess what I'm talking about is defensiveness when there was really no reason to be. Think back to yesterday. How many people did you either interact with or observe that misinterpreted something and immediately became defensive. Maybe they were bumped by a stranger on the metro . Maybe they were cutoff in traffic. Maybe they were having what should have been a friendly conversation. And one or both parties jumped to the conclusion that the other was out to get them, and made it into a personal attack. We're all guilty of it...

The most saddening thing by far that I've observed-- in relation the defensiveness, though, is the people that live their life thinking the world is out to get them. At every turn, someone is trying to screw them over or cheat them out of something. Unfortunately, not everyone can take a step back from situations and see circumstances and people for what they are.

There's an interesting combination of emotion and rational thinking involved. Perhaps it's a learned skill to pause, consider context and motive, then react. I'm sure it comes more naturally to some than others. And of course there are naive people, that are rarely defensive... probably not often enough.

Very few conclusions... just a lot of thoughts floating around.

Beautiful Bailey

When I lose someone important in my life, I try to think of their very best qualites and somehow apply that to myself and my life.

Pappy, my paternal grandfather, was the most wonderfully patient man. He was hardworking and I never remember him complaining. I'm sure you're all thinking I totally missed the mark on this one, right? Trust me, I work on this regularly. Admittedly, I have a long way to go.

What stands out about Nana, my paternal grandmother, was the way she cooked for the ones she loved. When we would visit, she would always fix my Dad a "Dutch breakfast"-- although none of us are really sure what was Dutch about it. Her house was full of treats-- whether it was the candy bowl full of blow pops or the chocolate cake sitting on her counter. Filling peoples' bellies comes much more naturally to me than patience.

Wednesday, March 19, 2008 our beloved family dog, Bailey passed away peacefully. While my family is now working through a great deal of sadness, our feeling of loss is a direct reflection of the joy she had brought us over the last 9 years.

She had so many great qualities. She exercised so much patience with the younger dogs, seeing them through their puppy years, their first lesson being not to go near her food bowl. I like to think she really taught Lucy, and more recently Beast, the ways of the world... or at least the back yard. Dad swears that Bailey used to run grids in the backyard searching for her ball. When I find myself enjoying a cool breeze, I will think of her. Or when I'm laying in the hammock on the patio, I will remember how she always used to try to crawl in.

I'm going to make a commitment to swim more often and take more walks. These are two things Bailey LOVED to do. Swimming came so naturally to her (duh, she's a lab). She loved the trips we took to the beach, trotting along the surf, letting the waves splash her. She never minded the occasional bath. As a puppy she used to try to take showers with us! On walks, Bailey would occasionally refuse to go down a path, and once her mind was made up, there was no changing it. And there was that brief period of time where she wouldn't leave the driveway unless another dog or human went along with her and Dad. She hated to be off her leash! The best part of the walk was always the journey up the hill-- wrestling the leash away from whoever was walking her. And if she finally got it away, she would bug them to take it back and start all over!

When Chris would come home she would sleep faithfully outside his door until he woke up to wrestle and play ball with her. This could last hours-- her laying in the middle of the hallway. But she was persistent. They had a special bond-- which I think was created late night, playing ball in the back yard.

I'll really miss seeing her lay at the top of the stairs, her barking until you throw her ball, and her constant solicitation of a good ear rub. We really got lucky to have such a wonderful pet.

What is it?

Why do women feel the need to constantly talk about what they've eaten? I work in an office full of women, and about mid-morning, a handful of them compare notes about what they have ingested so far that day. I don't care that you had yogurt and cheese for breakfast (into dairy much?) but then just couldn't resist that donut!

If you're going to eat it, enjoy it. But, if you're going to feel guilty about it for the next 3 hours and have to make confessions to anyone around you that will stand still long enough, don't indulge!

And another thing, talking about how unhealthy/horribly caloric something is while at a dinner table is RUDE. People are trying to enjoy their meal!

A little bit of this... a little bit of that...

I don't really have a topic for this blog. But it's been a while since I've written and I'm terribly bored at work. Don't really know why I'm writing, no one reads this thing anyway...

The trip to New Orleans with Kelly and Ash was great. Can't say too much about it-- other than LOTS of great memories... and pictures. When we returned to BBC's (a popular bar on Burbon St) they said "welcome back ladies"... that was our cue to leave and come back when we were a bit more drunk and a bit less embarassed. While at BBC's the second night, I discovered my idol was a singer in a cover band. This girl gave 100% every song, despite the absolute craziness going on around her. She didn't even allow her cracked out counter part shake her-- she was great!!

Everything else is status-quo I would say. I'm looking forward to going to Chicago at the end of the month for a conference. It should be pretty damn cold there, but it's a great city and my coworkers are usually a good time!

I was slightly disappointed at the strong show of support for Hillary in yesterday's primary. I was hoping we would have pretty much decided on Obama by this point. I guess this will keep things interesting. It's just been going on SO long. At least voters are engaged and turning out to vote...

I will try to think of better things to blog about for next time...

Bouncing it out

Time is flying by, and I'm getting pumped for my evening. WATER AEROBICS, here we (Ashhole and I) come!

We started in early January-- going twice a week. At first, admittedly, I thought it was a bit lame. But now I'm totally into it. All I needed was to step up my barbell game and buy some gloves!

Ash and I are the youngest in our class by at least 2 decades... maybe 3. And we weren't particularly warmly welcomed by all. Last week we got yelled at for talking to much. HELLO... we've got important things to discuss and I KNOW our conversation is way better than hearing the instructor yell out directions. Nothing against the instructor, but by now, we know the moves, and she's doing them on deck.

A week or two back we had a sub-- the Richard Simmons of water aerobics. Talk about balls to the walls! Sadly, I was unable to bring my A-game that evening. But WHAT A CLASS! He had us do all sorts of crazy moves. My favorite was what I like to call the suck it move-- which is like making the motion like we used to in the 8th grade. He ran, he skipped, he jumped. He pretty much had it all. Including mardi gras themed music.

And if I'm sharing with you my water aerobics experiences, I must tell you about the old lady with the orange lipstick. She just floats. Can't hear or see the instructor, so just floats floats floats... which, with the floaty belt, is very very easy. At first I was annoyed by her, because when we "travel" (read: move- usually skiing but sometimes jogging) she gets in the way. But I've come to grow fond of her, and look forward to seeing her orange lips tonight.

My favorite move you ask? Or maybe you didn't-- but I'm blogging so I'm going to tell you anyway. It's really really hard to pick just one. But if I absolutely had to, it would be the jump rope move. It's a like a vertical butterfly kick (very short fast kicks) whiel you move your arms in circles under water.

Locker room chats afterwards are also fun. More often than not we talk about bunions-- I kid you not.

Come by a session sometime. But please, try not to over-do it. My lifeguarding certification recently lapsed...

semantics

Now HERE is something I know a little something about:
A strategically crafted sentance can be as deceitful as a lie.

Now straight up: I like bananas and I hope everyone exercises their right to vote tomorrow. I encourage everyone to vote for change!! OBAMAOBAMAOBAMA.

And in honor of Mark Ward-- Peace, love and chicken grease! <3

A few thoughts on something I know nothing about

Over the past few weeks I've been pondering the idea of relationships. I'm certainly no expert. Maybe the furthest thing from it... but I've reached a conclusion or two that I believe to be reasonable... I guess I've reached them from my own experiences and from discussing and analyzing the experiences of my close friends and family.

1. A girlfriend or boyfriend (or significant other of any status) who encourages you to distance yourself from your friends and family should raise a red flag. One person will never provide enough comfort for another; it's essential for everyone to have a network of security. It doesn't take long for people, and couples, to fall into patterns and create habits. An "us vs. the world" mentality is an insecure and immature way of approaching an adult relationship. Love should not create feelings of dependence or desperation.

2. If you think you have found happiness with someone, and find yourself dissatisfied or unhappy with all other aspects of your life (friends and family, school, work, yourself), happiness is not at all what you have found. Aren't we all searching for someone that enhances all aspects of our life? Or at least, shouldn't we be?

I hope that, should I end up spending my life with someone, that person emulates the qualities I look for in my friends-- fun, ambitious and the desire to live each day to the fullest.

So-- that's my thing. Not sure I'm on point.

A tid bit before I bounce

I'm preparing to leave work-- but thought I would dabble in the blogging world for a hot minute.

Now, one of my bestest friends in the whole wide world lives in WVa. And I'll tell you, if it wasn't for her and her family/friends, I would swear the whole state is ass backwards. WHY would ANYONE vote for Huckabee, let alone the majority of registered republicans in a state? Seriously... what good qualities does this candidate have?! I think we need to try harder next time, West Virginny. Don't worry, you will get another chance come November. Abby-- if I ever learn you voted for him, I will give you the business!!!

Next I would like to express my excitement that the Kennedys have decided to take a page from the McDougall's book and publicly endorse Obama. What a wonderful idea. They must not live in WVa. The McDougalls, like the Kennedys, are supporting Obama from coast to coast. I guess the major difference is that I wasn't invited on stage at a huge rally to tell everyone about it. But I think Oprah, Michelle and Maria have it covered. YOU GO GIRLS. *high five* Change sounds good right about now. Let's change everything! Change change change.

I'm leaving work so I can go cook up some fondue with the fam in honor of Jill and Aunt Barb's birthday. They share the same day, exactly 20 years apart. If anyone has any great ideas for birthday presents for Jill, send them my way.

I know all you loyal readers are Lucy fans. She's doing well. Come party with us.